Ask Brackenfur!
by The Awesomeness of Moosey
Summary: Yay! I have Brackenfur here, and don't worry, I'm giving him love and care. But no more soda. I've noticed it's been doing strange things to him. Credit goes to xXFlamingAssassinXx!
1. Fritos and Soda

Hi, just to let you know, all credit goes to xXFlamingAssasinXx, who started this super great idea in the first place.

Me: So, hey everybody! This is Ask Brackenfur! He is sitting contently on my bed, eating Fritos, and drinking soda.

Brackenfur: Soooooooooooooooodaaaaaaa……………………………… 

Me: Sorry, about that, I've noticed that caffeine does some weird things to him.

**Brackenfur: -Burp- I think I'm alright now.**

Me: Okay, good. Well, just write to Brackenfur, and he'll answer your questions. And don't worry, I'm not torturing him, or treating him like a spoiled kittypet.

**Brackenfur: No, life's good.**

_Me: Yeah, well. Just stop staring at my hamster like that! He's not fresh-kill._

Brackenfur: (watching the wheel spin) But it's so fluffy… 

Me: Don't even think about it. Okay, so submit your questions, I'm sure that Brackenfur would love to read them!


	2. First Set of Questions

Dear Brackenfur,  
Hi! I'm Crimsonnight, and I have a few questions that maybe you could answer.  
1. How did you feel when you heard Cinderpelt died, but then saw your kits for the first time?  
2. How did you feel when you heard that Sorreltail was expecting your kits?  
Well...thats about it for now! Thanks a bunch.  
From,  
Crimsonnight

Hi Crimsonnight,

1. When I saw that my sister had defended Sorreltail and my kits against that badger, I loved her more than ever. I still think that it's cruel that StarClan had to take her life like that, but I know that she has a special place up there now. When I saw my kits, my heart was filled with overwhelming joy. I knew that my sister wouldn't have liked it if I was wailing over her death, so I tried to accept it.

2. I kind of had a good guess what was going on before she told me when she was sure, but I felt proud and happy all the same.

Thanks for the great questions! I hope my answers satisfied you,

Brackenfur

Dear Brackenfur,  
Poppyleaf says hi.  
What made you love Sorreltail?  
What did you think when Graystripe kept disapearing, and Fireheart had to mentor you?  
Did you know, before Leafpool had the dream, Firestar was going to make YOU deputy?  
How did you feel about when your mother (Frostfur) insisted on staying in the old forest?  
Is Sweptoverbypuppylove/Mooseantler/Thistelstar nice to you, because if she/he isn't, I'll kill him/her before she/he can get his/her life going.

Dear Thrushflight,

Tell Poppyleaf I said hi too.

Sorreltail seemed brave, and kind-hearted. It was hard not to love her.

I wasn't quite sure what to think, I was kind of frustrated with him for leaving me all the time. Fireheart was nice about it though, I think he knew what was going on with him, but I never did get the chance to ask him about it.

I can't remember now exactly how I felt. I did kind of want to be deputy, but only so that I could serve my clan best I could. I don't remember feeling jealous of Brambleclaw though. He's a good, respectable deputy, even if he's younger than me.

Don't worry, she's treating me alright. She's starting to run out of fritos though, and she said that the only thing left in the cupboard is cookies. She's getting a box of them now. I wonder whether they taste as good as Fritos.

Love, Brackenfur.

LOVE BRACKENFUR!  
questions:  
1) when you start to fall for sorreltail, brackenfur?  
2) how does it feel to have 3 daughters--of whom one of them is a reincarnated medicine cat?  
3) do you like rabbit meat:D  
4) when graystripe returned, how did u feel to ahve your mentor back?  
5) do you like having apprentices?

pearla

Dear Pearla,

It's nice to know that I'm so loved.

1) I think I started falling for her before the monsters started tearing down the forest.

2) Well, I think they're all pretty wonderful in their own ways. I never really understood though why Cinderpaw looks and acts so much like my sister. Do you really think she's Cinderpelt reincarnated?

Mooseantler: Of course she's reincarnated, Mouse-brain!

Brackenfur: Well, excuuuuuse me.

Mooseantler: Let's just go onto the next question.

Brackenfur: -sticks out his tongue at me- fine.

3) It's pretty yummy, I have to admit. It's their fluffy tails that I accidently swallow and make me hack up furballs.

4) I felt so happy. Even though he disappeared a lot when I was his apprentice, he always made up for it one way or another. He's so likable and easygoing. :D

5) Yeah, it's really fun! It's so nice to teach eager young cats.

Love,

Brackenfur

um... You were made a warrior moons before Sorreltail was even born. That's just gross. I think you were a warrior in Forest of Secrets, and Sorreltail was born in Dangerous Path. She wasn't even an apprentice until after the Darkest Hour!

Dear Pinefur,

Just to let you know, I don't think age really matters. Look at Dustpelt and Ferncloud. Their age difference is even more troublesome then Sorreltail's and mine. And look, I like her for her, she's not really that much younger than me. If you have a problem with it, take it up with my lawyer.

Mooseantler: You don't have a lawyer.

Brackenfur: I will, one day. Pass the cookies, Mooseantler. I'm getting hungry.

Love, Brackenfur


	3. The Glare of Doom

**WARNING: The following conversation may be a pathetic attempt of humor.**

Brackenfur: Yay-yay! There's more letters. I love letters!

Mooseantler: More than Fritos even?

Brackenfur: Yes, I think so.

Mooseantler: What about cookies?  
Brackenfur: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! NEVER!

Mooseantler: Alright then. You're getting a bit crazy, maybe I should open a window –crosses room and opens window by bed-

Brackenfur: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! THE LIGHT IT BURNS!

Mooseantler: Come on Brackenfur; get a move on! You're going to have to go outside some time.

Brackenfur: Not since your mom bought me a litter box.

Mooseantler: ……………

Brackenfur: Glaring at me won't help.

Mooseantler:……………………………………..

Brackenfur: Okay, that's enough, stop it.

Mooseantler: ……………………………………………

Brackenfur: STOP! PLEASE!

Mooseantler: ……………………………………………

Brackenfur: Fine, I'll go outside. But can I answer my letters first?

Mooseantler: Of course.

Hi Brackenfur!  
Why do like Sorreltail?  
How's life, apart from the fact that you've been captured?  
Do you want to eat Sweptoverbypuppylove's hamster?  
If you could change your name, would you and what would it be?  
If you could live in another clan, would you and which one?  
Do you ever think of Thornclaw, Brightheart and Cinderpelt as siblings, or just as fellow clanmates?  
Who's your father?  
Did you suspect Graystripe of anything when he wasn't really around to train you?  
Are you bored of my questions?  
If you are, do you want me to shut up?  
HI!  
--deviL a.wakenn  
PS: Have fun answering them! I'll think of more next time. )

Dear devil a.wakenn,

She's brave, strong, caring, gentle, and smart.

Oh, it's great so far. But Mooseantler doesn't give me soda anymore because I got too "hyper"

Mooseantler: Well it's true!

Brackenfur: Well excuuuuuuuuuse me!

As far as Mooseantler's hamster goes, I used to, but I talked to him and found out he's a pretty good guy. His name's Walnut, which I think it is a funny name, don't you? I've never realized that the fresh-kill I eat has feelings too, you know?

I kind of like the name Brackenfur, but if I could change it, I would change it to Blizzardfrost. I think that's a pretty cool name, and it makes me sound dangerous and on the edge.

Mooseantler: ……?

Brackenfur: Yeah, you heard right.

If I could choose to live in any clan, I'd think I'd still choose to be in ThunderClan.

I think of them all as siblings, especially Cinderpelt. We are exceptionally close.

Give me a reason why I'd tell you who my father is?

Mooseantler: -cough cough- Lionheart!

Brackenfur: How'd you know?  
Mooseantler: -surprised- I got it right?

Brackenfur: -mysteriously- maybe you did, maybe you didn't….

I did suspect that Graystripe was doing something that he wasn't supposed to be doing, and I had a pretty good idea that Fireheart knew too, but I never got a chance to find out where he was going until he brought his kits to camp.

Not at all, I love answering questions.

I would never ask someone to shut up.

Mooseantler: But you told me to shut up three times this morning already!

Brackenfur: -mumbling- maybe I did, maybe I didn't…

Hi!

Love, Brackenfur

P.S. I'm looking forward to reading them.

Dear Brackenfur  
Do you like cookies as much as Fritos? If you don't, I have some. (Shakes family-sized bag of Fritos)  
Pepsi or Coke?  
Mountain Dew, Sprite, or Sierra Mist?  
Which of my names do you like best, Poppyleaf, Thrushflight, Leopardfrost, Danglepaw, or Duckfeather?  
Which would you rather be, Brackenpelt, Brackenclaw, Brackengrowl, Brackenfang, Brackenfrost, Brackenbramble, Brackenbiscuit, Brackencookie, Brackentree, Brackenbush, Brackenfoot, Brackenbutton, Brackencat, Brackentooth, Brackenleaf, Brackenflower, Brackentail, Brackenpoppy, Brackencinders, Brackennoodle, Brackencrown, Brackenbranch, Brackeneyes, Brackenleopard, Brackenspots, Brackenstripe, Brackencolor, Brackentwoleg, Brackentom, Brackenthorn. You can't be Brackenfur.  
Which would you rather eat, a frog, a snake, or a rat?  
Would you rather be Brambleclaw, or Blackclaw (of RiverClan)  
Would you rather eat Dorritos or Lays Potato Chips  
If you had to be a she-cat and mate with someone or StarClan would kill every cat in the world and stick them in The Place OF No Stars, What would your name be, and who would you mate with?  
If Sorreltail died, and she was the only queen so all your kits died, would you commit suicide?  
If Sorreltail died, and your kits would die if no one fed them, would you go to another clan and beg a queen to feed them?

Dear Duckfeather,

Fritos are nice, but cookies are LOVERLY. Thanks for the offer though, -grabs a pawful and muches on some-

What's Pepsi and Coke? Mooseantler has only fed me Sprite and Root Beer.

Mooseantler: and it's a good thing too. You don't need any more soda for at least a century.

Brackenfur: …………………………….

Mooseantler: Glaring at me won't work. Besides, you're always too distracted by things to carry on glaring at me-

Brackenfur: Lookies! A squirrel!

Sprite, because it's the only thing I've had so far.

I like Danglepaw and Leopardfrost, but Mooseantler prefers Duckfeather because she's obsessed with ducks, cows, moose, puppies, cats, and tree kangaroos.

Probably Brackencookie.

Ewww, they all sound so horrible! Can't a cookie be one of the options? Ughhh, fine, I'd probably choose a rat because it's the only thing that has meat.

Brambleclaw.

Lays Potato Chips. Mooseantler's brothers snuck some for me and they taste heavenly.

Do I have to answer this question? Er, fine. I'd probably be Cinderheart, in honor of my sister, and I'd choose…ewww, okay, maybe, I don't know…

Mooseantler: Don't try to avoid the question, you love letters, remember?

Brackenfur: Fine! Sheesh, I'd probably choose the nicest tom as a mate. Happy?

No, I'd wait till the end of my time to be with her. Because if I commited suicide, Sorreltail would be angry with me. I'd rather fight for my clan till my time comes.

Yes! I would. I'd do anything to keep them alive.

Thanks for the questions,

Love, Brackenfur.

hahahahaha! brackenfur's replies were hilarious! thx, puppylove:D  
pearla

Brackenfur: See Mooseantler? Some people really do think I'm funny.

Mooseantler: -mumbling- whatever.

well Dustpelt was made into a warrior in Fire and Ice, and Fernpaw became an apprentice at least by Dangerous Path... so it's not quite as bad, but never mind!

Wait! Another question! -evil grin- Why'd you name Molekit... Molekit? MOLEkit. WHY?

And I know it seems like I'm totally criticizing you but you are really one of my favorite characters.

First of all, Sorreltail picked the name Molekit. Second of all, don't make fun of my only son.

Thanks for the criticizing but lovable questions,

Brackenfur.


	4. No More Cookies

Mooseantler: Okies, **PAY ATTENTION!** Brackenfur has something serious to say.

Brackenfur: Alrighty, well. I might be going back to the forest if more letters don't come. I mean, I was really liking this vacation. It's GREAT! And Plus, in the forest, they don't have any cookies. I'd die if I went back now! So, **PLEASE, **_**PLEASE**__**PLEASE**_ write me some more letters. I don't care what they're about, but Mooseantler's mom said that if I don't have a purpose at the house any longer, I'd have to go.

Mooseantler: I don't want him to leave, my hamster finally has another friend.

Brackenfur: So please write. I beg of you! For the sake of StarClan! For the sake of cookies! Especially for the sake of cookies.


	5. Another Letter!

Only because you asked so nicely...  
Hey Brackenfur! 'Tis Hawkwhisker here. So may I start by saying that you and Sorreltail are adorable together? Because I just did. So! Questions!  
What is your favorite part of being a warrior?  
Um... right now my brain is lagging and I can't think of more. But... I LOVE YOU!  
Hawkeh

Dear Hawkeh,

Thanks! I think so too : )

Well, I love being a warrior, but my favorite part is the feeling I get when I race into a battle, with my clanmates pelts brushing against my own. I love fighting for my clan.

That's alright, my brain lags sometimes too.

With Love,

Brackenfur


	6. Lemonade

It's sad that I'm the only review...  
SO!  
Dear Brackenfur,  
Thankies for answering my last letter. What's it like to have kits? Is it cool?  
Um... more brain lag.  
--Hawkeh

Dear Hawkeh,

I think it's great being a father. I love it! My daughters are like a miracle to me. I wish I could've been able to mentor them as well. One time, Cinderpaw brought me a rabbit the size of a fox! I can't believe how much they've grown.

More Love,

Brackenfur.

Mooseantler: Awwww, that was a sweet letter, Brackenfur.

Brackenfur: Can't you move? I don't like it when people read over my shoulder.

Mooseantler: Well, Excuuuuuuuuse me!

Brackenfur: Get a life, Mooseantler.

Mooseantler: Well, Excuuuuuuuuse you!

Brackenfur: Okay, you can stop now. I get it.

Hi there Brackenfur!  
This is Silverspirit! I must say that this is pretty funny, and that one of my best friends, Cough, Tigerstripe, cough LOVES you! I can understand why, but I prefer Dustpelt, no offense. I think you are pretty cool...don't tell Tigerstripe I told you about her infatuation...hehehe

To the questions!

I have written the beginning of a story, and i wanted to know what you thought of the name. Her name is going to be Emberheart, but right now it is Emberpaw. Do you like it?  
If you could, would you like ot be Leader?  
Deputy?  
What is your favorite kind of cookie?  
What would you do if I gave you a life times supply of cookies?  
How can you understand what we humans, i mean twolegs, are saying?  
My dog doesn't hurt cats, would you like to meet her?  
That's all I can think of, so keep on answering questions, okay?

-Silverspirit  
P.S. If you want to read one of my stories, the titles are:  
A Hidden Past, Buried (I wrote this one with Tigerstripe), and Out of The Dark. Please R&R! I want to know what you think!

Well, hey there Silverspirit,

Tell Tigerstripe that it's nice to know that I'm so loved.

Mooseantler: cough, cough

Brackenfur: What is it now???

Mooseantler: Whaaaaat? I was just coughing.

Brackenfur: Oh, for a second I thought you were making fun of me.

Mooseantler: ……………………………It's called sarcasm

Brackenfur: Oh, that's what it's called!

I've read the story, and I think that Emberheart is a brilliant name.

Sure, why not? I would be able to order all the cats to share my love of cookies.

The same as above.

Chewy Triple Chocolate Chip.

I would eat them, of course.

Cause I'm just cool like that.

Sure, what's her name?

Okies, no problem.

With Love,

Brackenfur

P.S. I've read them, and I'll review them right now, don't worry.

Bracenfur: You know what, Mooseantler?

Mooseantler: What?

Brackenfur: We should open a lemonade stand.

Mooseantle: Why???

Brackenfur: Because we can share the refreshing lemony taste with the world at a horrible price.

Mooseantler: Come on, Brackenfur, what's the real reason?  
Brackenfur: I just want more $$$$$$ because then I can get some more cookies.

Mooseantler: Brackenfur, it's been pouring on and off for the last few days, who wants to buy cookies in the middle of a thunderstorm?

Brackenfur: I bet my devoted fans would.

Mooseantler: -heavy sigh- Fine, but Brackenfur, keep in mind that I'd only be sitting there on a wooden chair handing out ice-cold lemonade with rain flooding from the sky for you.

[Suddenly my kitty, Cricket, walks into the room

Cricket: Hey dudes, what's up?

Brackenfur: Mooseantler and I are going into the lemonade business.

Cricket: May I help?

Brackenfur: Yeah, you can be our spokesperson.


	7. A Faithful fan!

Silverspirit is back! And she thinks Brackenfur is cooler than ever!

My dog's name is Orfa!  
I have more questions:

If you couldn't mate with Sorreltail, who would you mate with?  
If Cinderpelt wasn't your sister, would you mate with her?  
Do you like your lemonade REALLY tart?  
What is your second favorite cookie?

That's all, until you answer more questions...

By!

Love,   
Silverspirit

P.S. Mooseantler, you need to be less sarcastic, and more nice, otherwise i'm gonna go into your story and fix you!  
P.S.S. Brackenfur, how would you like to be in my stories?

Dearest Silverspirit,

Orfa is an awesome name. It would be nice to meet your doggy.

I wouldn't mate with anybody. I'd rather be with Sorreltail than any cat in the forest.

No, I don't think so.

No, I like loooooooooooots of sugar in my lemonade. I add cookie dough to it too. It tastes like heavan.

Chewy Double Chocolate Chip, of Course.

Love,

Brackenfur

P.S. Don't worry, Mooseantler only uses sarcasm when it's necessary. She takes good care of me, and don't forget, she's the one who feeds me cookies.

P.S.S. I would be honored beyond…um, cookieness, to be in one of your stories.


	8. Cookie Dough and Camping!

_You put cookie dough... in your lemonade.  
Thickety, get that poor cat some freshkill, please. He's going crazy._

Dear IloveDrMcDreamy (Hawkeh),

So, you think that putting cookie dough in your lemonade is crazy, huh? Well let me get something straight with you!! There isn't anything wrong-

Mooseantler: Brackenfur! Use your manners.

Alrighty. –mumbles- sorry.

Mooseantler: I really am trying to get him to eat fresh-kill again, but he'd rather eat cookie dough off a spoon. That's it, Brackenfur! I've been holding it off 'till now to tell you, but I'm telling you now! Dad said we're going camping on Saturday!

Brackenfur: NO, NO, NO! There aren't cookies in the wild!

Mooseantler: -gently- It's for the best. I'm thinking of your health.

Brackenfur: -sniff sniff- okie dokie. I guess you're right.

Love,

Brackenfur

P.S. I'll keep you posted on how horrible camping was.

**Mooseantler: I like the following letter because it asks the type of questions that I ask him all the time.**

**Brackenfur: Yeah, yeah, put a sock in it for a second, would you Moosey? I'm trying to reply to a letter here.**

**Mooseantler: He gets like this when he's working. : )**

_HI!  
Um...um...um...  
1. How come you and Cinderpelt were made earlier than Thornclaw and Brightheart?  
2. Did you think Brightheart was going to die when she was mauled?  
3. Why does no one ever see you takling with Thornclaw or Brightheart?  
4. You're awesome!  
5. )  
--deviL a.wakenn  
PS: HI!!  
PPS: )_

Hey devil a.waken,

1.Cinderpelt and I were the first litter. Thornclaw and Brightheart are the second.

2.I had faith that my sister was going to live. But it pained me to see her hurt like that.

3.Cinderpelt and I are closer to each other because we've been through a lot together and are from the same litter. I still talk to Brightheart and Thornclaw a lot, and I was so proud to see my brother and sister made warriors.

4. Thanks!! You are too. : )

Love,

Brackenfur

_MWHAHAHHAHAHHAAHA I HATE YOU U HATE LET BARNEY WITH A GREAT BIG SHOT AND A BULLET TO THE HEAD WADDA KNOW NOW BARNEYS DEAD  
Do u hate barney cause if u dont i will go to my weponre and find somthing to injure with_

as sweetly as i can be Ghostkit  
P.S.I not very nice 

Dear Ghostkit,

No meaning to sound harsh or rude, but have you had an overdose of sugar or something? Or did you just forget to take your medication?  
Yes, sometimes Mooseantler's dog, Lacey watches Barney and refuses to change the channel for me, so I leave the room. Barney is a pain in the tail end, if you know what I mean?

Love, Brackenfur

P.S. Nonsense! You're perfectly friendly.

Mooseantler: cough-cough

Brackenfur: Put a sock in it.

Mooseantler: You're saying that a lot lately. Why?

Brackenfur: I happen to like socks, that's all.

_Dear Brackenfur...  
I have got a few random questions for you.  
1. Do you like Waffles?  
2. Do you think that ShadowClan is Evil? Or are they just kinda crazy?  
3. Do you like the name Tigerfuzz?  
4. Do you like Tacos?  
AND the final question...  
5. Do you think Mooseantler is kinda funky smelling?_

:D pip Taco :D 

Dear pip Taco…

I like random! .

1.Yes, I like French Toast too.

2.Bluestar told me when I was an apprentice that the north wind blows over the cats of ShadowClan and chills their hearts; so that they're basically evil. But I think that they're just crazy.

3.Yeah, it's great: ) : ) : )

4.Who doesn't?

5. Sometimes…

Mooseantler: Hey!!

Brackenfur: I can't lie to them. : )

Love, Brackenfur!


	9. Brackenfur's Homesickness

YOU DIDNT PUT THE SONG H WELL:(  
DO YOU LIKE...CANDY  
IF NOT OR YOU HAVENT TASTED IT I WILL GO TO MY WEPONREA  
as nice as pocibly Ghostkit

Dearest Ghostkit,

Yes I do.

Love, Brackenfur

Mooseantler: No you don't!

Brackenfur: Shhhhh!! Didn't you hear that? That kit has weaponry!

Heya, Moosey!  
Ok, brackenfur, my second set o qus:  
1) brackenfur...brackenfur...  
brackenfur. if you put yourself in the shoes-well, paws-of a she-cat for one day, who would it be?

2) if brambleclaw promised you you'd be deputy when he was brambleSTAR and that time came but he chose, say...whitewing instead, what would you do?

3) (im running low on internet time) what if you ahd actually had a chance to mentor snowkit before a mean old hawk (growls) carried him off? what would you pick to be his warrior anme?

hugs from a fan of yours,  
pearla

Hey, Pearla,

1) Probably Sorreltail or Cinderpelt

2) I'd feel hurt that he hadn't kept his promise, but I'm sure he might have a reason.

3) I really liked Snowkit. He was almost like a brother to me. I was so hurt when the Hawk took him. (growls as well) Firestar would probably have chosen a name for him, not me, but if I could give him a warrior name it would be Snowbird.

Hugs Pearla back,

Brackenfur

Dear Brakencookie,

My name is Flamepaw. I have some questions for you.  
1) If you could pick any cat to be your kits mates who would they be?  
2) Why are you staying with Moosey, don't you like the warrior life better?  
3) If you had to chose to defend one would you defend Sorreltail first or you clan?

Thanks!

Dear Flamepaw,

1) Here you go: Honeypaw and Mousepaw: Cinderpaw and Berrypaw: Poppypaw and Birchfall. Of course, I will accept any cat that my daughters choose.

2) I know, I'll tell you all about that in the end.

3) Gah!!! That question bothers me greatly. I don't know. I love my clan, but I love my Sorreltail. I pick Sorreltail.

Thanks for the great questions!!

Love, Brackencookie

Yo! Brackenfur, gots some questions.  
1. Do you wish you had fritos and sodas and cookies in the wild?:D  
2. How did you feel when you saw Cinderkit?  
3. Anyone else before Sorreltail?  
4. How would you like to die? Don't know why I ask.

Dear Starfrost,

1. YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!

2. Like I was staring at a reflection of my sister, as if an old memory of a distant dream stirred inside me. Hey! That's pretty poetic. I should get that published.

3. ………………..no

4. I've never stopped to ask myself that. To tell you the truth, I'd rather die as an accomplished warrior, defending my mate and my clan to the last breath.

Love, Brackenfur

SUGAR IS AWESOME I NEVER EAT AND I GET PUMPED UP and IM EVIL YOU CANT CHANGE THAT NEVER  
Ghostkit  
P.S.once u get out i would look out for hummers on the tunderpath  
P.S.S.black and blue ones too  
P.S.S.S.MWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA  
P.S.S.S.S.um MY CLASS SAID YOUR OLD OLDIE (skips off singing lets kill barney)

I would never want to change you, Ghostkit.

Brackenfur

P.S. Thanks for the advice

P.S.S. Alrighty

P.S.S.S. Okay, then

P.S.S.S.S. I'm sorry they feel that way.

Mooseantler: Wow, you handled that really well 

**Brackenfur: Yeah, I guess so.**

**Mooseantler: You're such a lovable kitty, Brackenfur**

**Brackenfur: Yeah, I guess so.**

**Mooseantler: Are you even listening to me?**

**Brackenfur: Yeah, I guess so.**

**Mooseantler: No, you're listening to my IPOD!**

**Brackenfur: Yeah, I guess so.**

**Mooseantler: SIGH**

O.o advice that was a warning umm i mean(lying)IM NOT GONNA RUN OVER OR ANY THING  
Ghostkit  
P.S.OLDIE

Dear Ghostkit,

Thanks for that review. Ever reviewer is worthy of worthiness.

Love, Brackenfur

P.S. I'm still sorry you feel that way.

Dearest Brakenfur,

Do you like the life of a Warrior?  
Are you happy Eirn made the books?  
Whats your favorite color? (Sorry random.)

Yours,  
Skycloud

Dearest Skycloud,

Yes, but I wish they had cookies in the wild.

Yes!

Yellow : )

Yours truly,

Brackenfur

**Mooseantler: And now, Brackenfur is going to share with his writers a section of his journal.**

**Brackenfur: Yes, that's right, I keep a journal.**

Day One 

**Life's good. I caught three squirrels, five mice, two rabbits, and seven birds. Looks like I still got skills. But no matter how far I hunt, I can't find cookies.**

**Day Two**

**Still no cookies**

**Day Three**

**Rejoice! I had almost forgotten that I had hidden cookies away in Mooseantler's sleeping bag. They are still there. I hugged a cookie and ate it. It tasted like StarClan.**

**Day Four**

**It just so happens that this camping trip was on ShadowClan territory. Lucky me, huh? I had a squabble with Blackstar and Russetfur until Mooseantler came to the rescue and yelled at the cats to go back to their camp. You should have seen them run. HAHAHAHA**

**Day Five**

**I am nursing my cuts and bruises on my own. Mooseantler offered to give me stuff from a "First Aid Kit" or something, but I don't trust Two-leg medication. I am missing Leafpool's and Jaypaw's skills more than ever.**

**Day Six**

**We are going home a day early because my cuts are getting worse. "Poor kitty" Mooseantler's brothers said to me.**

**Day Seven**

**I'm home…but I feel homesick…yet in the forest…I felt homesick….I'm confuzzled. Will my writers help me out?**


	10. Back to Teh Clans

MWHAHAAHAHAHA(takes out flamethrower)UMM HAVE YOU HEARD WHAT I DID TO CLOUDTAIL HE LOOKS LIKE CROWFEATHER NOW MWAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA  
Ghostkit

Ghostkit,

Go to a doctor's or something.

Sincerely worried,

Brackenfur

Poor Brackenwaffle...  
More Questions!  
1) How would you feel if You feel if It was I who attacked you, but not with claws, but with complete RANDOMNOMINITITY!?! hehe  
2) Do you like Tawnypelt... or any other ShadowClan cats? This could include me and my ShadowClan buddy AND deputy Lynxheart (She has really big ears, LOL)  
3) Do you like pizza? I wuvs pizza... Piza...  
4) VeggieTales or 3-2-1 Penguins?  
5) Waffles or Root Beer?

Thats all, Brackenwaffle... I LIKE THAT NAME!  
Hearts,  
Pip Taco or Maplestar... W/e... .

Dear Pip Taco or Maplestar,

1) Confuzzled.

2) I like Tawnypelt as a friend, I guees, but nothing more. For the others, I can't say because I have never met them, but Lynxheart sounds awesomeness.

3) I wuvs pizza too. I like pepperoni.

4) 3-2-1 PENGUINS!

5) Waffles.

I like that name too.

Hearts and Hugs,

Brackenfur

Yeah, thats E-Z!  
-At the forest you miss your cookies!  
-At Moosey's house you miss your friends and family.  
1. Don't you miss Sorreltail? Or whatever her name is...  
2. You LIKE jaypaw?!?!? (Faints at Brakenfur's stupidy-ness)  
3. If you had to leave Thunderclan for no apparent reason and never come back which clan would you join?  
4. Do you play a x-box? (Hands x-box and Game-boy.)  
5. Trust me, 'First Aid kits' Have what Leafpool and.. Jaypaw use, it has just been... Liquified..

Dear Mysterious Miracle,

Thanks for that nice explanation.

1. YES!

2. He's okay once you get to know him. (I am NOT stupid)

**Mooseantler: Touchy, touchy :)**

**Brackenfur: Put a sock in it.**

3. ArcticClan. O.o

4. Hey, thanks!

5. Alright. I guess I get it, but they look scary to me still…

Love, Brackenfur

Brackenfur,

I think you should go home, because then you'll be with your friends and family, and Mooseantler can come visit you and bring cookies!!

In other words you get both. Yay!

1) After your 14 cookie, do you still feel homesick?

2) If you ever have kits with Sorreltail again, what will you name them?

A really big fan of yours,

Redtail's love Grassfeather

Dearest Redtail's love Grassfeather,

True, true. Very true.

1. Yeah…but the cookies help.

2. Well, I would name them, Moosekit (in honor of Moosey), Oriolekit (because I think that's a pretty name), and Coalkit (in honor of my sister Cinderpelt)

With love,

Brackenfur

**I haved reached a decision. I will, in fact, go back to ThunderClan, if you promise to come every week and bring a box of cookies, Moosey.**

**Mooseantler: Yeah, sure. But I'll miss ya, buddy.**

**Me too. I guess…**

**Mooseantler: Hey:(**

**Just joking. And, I since I'm moving, you can still write to me, but my address has changed. Here it is:**

Brackenfur 

_Warriors Den, ThunderClan Camp._

_Some british forest by a lake, UK_

**Alright, that just about settles it. Thanks for being such good writers! I love you alls sos much. Huggles reviewers, and pats Ghostkit lightly on the head.**

**--Brackenfur**


	11. DOUBLE STUFFED & Lots o' questions

AWW! (Hands Envelop with 'Brackenfur Warriors Den, ThunderClan Camp. Some british forest by a lake, UK' on it, and whith 'Coco Cookies' on it)  
Bye Brackeny! (crys)

THANKS!

-eats cookies in one bite-

It's not goodbye. I'll still write. Please don't cry.

Love, Brackenfur

Dear Brackenfur,  
Be prepared for 20 bizarre and some-what annoying questions that will have your head spinning in anger. :D So lets begin!  
Who is your favorite cat in ThunderClan?  
Why?  
Is it because they worship you?  
Are you lying?  
Are you afraid of death?  
Or more afraid of mice?  
I bet it's the second one.  
Who is cooler? Heavystep or Louis-Joseph, Marquis de Montcalm (I bet you don't know who that is)?  
Do you like trees?  
Why or why not?  
What is 1+1?  
Tsk tsk. Explain why you think it's a 3.  
What is your occupation?  
Don't have one? Thought so.  
Do you like twolegs?  
No? Is it because they smell so much?  
Well then, you should purchase Febreze air fresheners.  
They're a great help at odor-controlling.  
Do you feel at home yet at FFN?  
I hope not.  
Feel like killing me yet?  
You sure?  
Well then, let me teach you how. First you unsheathe your claws, then you raise your forepaw, and let out a battle caterwaul. And you pounce. And fight. And lose. And watch me as I do my happy dance. :)  
I'm sorry if I offended you in any way, shape or form, but this is my job-- to give you more reviews, and as an Ask Brackenfur reviewer, I have the right to offend you. Got it? Yes? Great.  
(and now for something absolutely ridiculous and pointless...)  
Do you like badgers?...  
...with ketchup?  
-EmogaL-  
Dear Moosey,  
As the Ask Yellowfang co-writer (collab with Skyheart/Cloudfire), I know the joys and pains of answering these questions (some which are absolutely ridiculous). How do you feel about answering the questions? How long does it take to answer a batch of them? Do you ever get writer's block when trying to think of something humorous and entertaining to say? Do you ever wish you never started this? Or do you thank god every second of your life that you started the wonderful 'Ask ' thing? Did you ever reply to someone's review but then thought of something better to say later? Do you think Skyheart is cool (say 'no')?  
Thanks for your time,  
- the very pwnful EmogaL  
aka Phoenixstar

Dear EmogaL (a.k.a. Phoenixstar),

1) -blushes- Sorreltail.

2) Because she's pretty. –blushes-

3) No, actually sometimes she plays hard to get.

4) No.

5) Not really.

7) Mice are scary. –blushes-

8) You were correct. –blushes-

9) They're all losers. I mean, Heavystep died long ago, and then he came back to life! How unfair is that?

10) Trees are fun.

11) They're fun.

12) Eleventy-7

13) I didn't say three- I said Eleventy-7. That's right, right?

14) ThunderClan Cat. I don't like it 'cause I don't get paid.

15) That IS a job!

16) Moosey's Oaky Doaky

17) Yes

18) Sure, why not?

19) Yes, I believe so.

20) I left recently to return to the forest. Moosey still visits me to deliver cookies.

21) Why?

22) Now, you're cool.

23) Yup.

24) That would be rude.

25) You didn't offend me.

26) Yes.

27) YES.

Love, Brackenfur

P.S. I hand this over to Moosey now.

Dear EmogaL,

I just give Brackenfur advice about how to reply. Sometimes letters make him angry. He nearly burned the last one that Ghostkit wrote.

Brackenfur doesn't take long.

Brackenfur just acts like himself. He really connects with his readers.

Sometimes Brackenfur blames me for the work his job involves, but he got over it.

Yeah. My advice isn't the best sometimes.

I dunno.

Hey, thanks for writing!

-Moosey

I PROMISE I SHALL GIVE YOU OREO COOKIES OF YOUTH, and there DOUBLE STUFFED, which means MORE SUGAR! YAHOO! You know Brakenfur, you on sugar is my normal...thats kinda scary. anyway...crap i forgot what i was gonna say...I REMEMBER...nope lost it...i'll be back...eventually...I LOVE YOU!

here are some COOKIES! and Sprite, sprite zero though i can't have the regular kind T-T, which means this soda has no sugar, caffiene or carbs...tell Graystripe and Firestar i said HI!

Dear for the cookies! I've never tried DOUBLE STUFFED before. They taste simply heavenly.

I love you too.

Thanks!

Kay. I will, don't worry.

Love, Brackenfur

yay for brackenfur coming to ArticClan! anyways, it's so sad it's the end!

Hawkeh,

Its not the end, it's a whole new beginning!!!!!!!!!!

Love, Brackenfur

hey I AM NOT GOING BACK NEVER  
SAM:um that is why you were out  
ME:got a problem with that  
Sam:no

Consider it. The veterinarians are just there to help!!! And you need help!!!!

With Love, Brackenfur


	12. Threat Letter and Llama Q & As

Which of the following names would sound best on each of your kits:

Honeypaw:

Honeypool  
Honeywhisker  
Honeyfur

Poppypaw:

Poppytail  
Poppyleaf  
Poppystorm  
Poppystream

Molepaw:

Moletail  
Molewhisker  
Moleheart

Cinderpaw:

Cindersoul  
Cinderpool  
Cinderdream  
Cinderleaf

Dear Tainted Shadow Rebel,

Honeypool,

Poppystream,

Moleheart, (Bless his little soul)

Cinderleaf

Love,

Brackenfur

Dear Brackenwaffle:  
1) How much do you miss life with Moosey?  
2) Do you like waffles?  
3) Do you like pancakes?  
4) Do you like french toast?  
5) Do you like anime?  
6) Did you know that there is a Powerpuff Girl Anime?  
7) Does this frighten You at all?  
8) Do you like Llamas?  
9) Have you ever seen a llama?  
10) Kissed a llama?  
11) On the llama?  
12) Have you ever tried Gingersnaps?

Well, here, have some gingersnaps and root beer! Suggar! whoops

(Reminder to Moosey: I have severe writers block for both of my stories. Any ideas?)

Dear Beloved Pip,

Lots.

YES, YES I DO!

Pancakes scare me.

I've never tried French toast before.

Yes, 'tis cool.

REALLY??? AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

YES, YES IT DOES!

Oh, yes. They are so very cuddly.

On Animal Planet.

No, but I'd like to.

OMSC! I just realized that those words are apart of the Llama song. That song rules. I miss that song.

That's a type of cookie right? I LUUUUUUUURVE cookies. But sadly I have never tried gingersnaps. Or root beer. Soda gives me gas.

**Moosey: Help is on the way.**

With heartfelt love,

Brackenwaffle

hi...  
how r u...  
i like firestar...  
i found a way to get to tigerstar...  
i shot him down...  
i helped in the torching of cloudtail...  
we also torched whitewing...  
silently stalking you brackenfur (takes out flamethrower)

_anonoymus_

Dear anonoymus,

I'll have you know that ever since I've been back at the forest, my fighting skills have sharpened.

You have been warned,

Love, Brackenfur

Brakenfur,  
Did you give Sorreltail any of those cookies?

Amberglass,

Maybe, maybe not.

**Moosey: Brackenfur!**

Ok, I didn't…but I was going to.

Love,

Brackenfur


	13. Explosion in Cups and Jealousy

_And now I shall ask some questions_

_And now I shall ask some questions!  
1. Who is the most pwnful person ever?  
2. Why do you like cookies?  
3. Why do you like Moosey? I don't- just kidding :)  
4. What's the best part about being Brackenfur?  
5. Emus or llamas?  
6. Pie or cookies?  
7. Soda or pop?  
8. Vanilla or chocolate?  
9. Beach or snow?  
10. Hawkeh or Moosey?  
Your Biggest Fan,  
Hawkeh_

My bud the Hawkster,

1. You! Or Moosey. Or Sorreltail. Or my kits. Or cookies.

2. Because their crunchy alone, but when you dip them in milk, they get all softie. That's an analogy for Moosey. She's a real crab when she wakes up, but when you feed her milk, she's happy!

**Moosey: Hey! I don't like you giving away my personal information. And I am NOT crabby in the morning.**

**Brackenfur: Tsk tsk, it's morning, and you're crabby. What more proof is there?**

3. –Huggles Moosey- she saved me from a life without cookies, of course I like her!!

4. I have an oober cool personality.

5. Llamas.  
6. COOKIES!

7. Pop? Is that an explosion in a cup? I must obtain some!

8. Yum, chocolate…

9. Snow's cold and wet. I don't know what a beach is though. Is that like the shore around the lake?

10. hmmmmmm….I can't live without your humor and comfort Hawkeh, but I can't live without Moosey's cookies. I choose both.

**Moosey: You only love me for my cookies? I thought what we had was special!**

**Brackenfur: Ok, Ok. You give good hugs.**

**Moosey: Ah, really?  
Brackenfur: Don't mention this to the warriors at camp. **

Love, Brackenfur

_

* * *

__Dear Brackenfur,_

_1 why are you so cuddleful?_

_2 Do you like Hawkfrost?_

_3 Do you hate nightcloud?_

_all the time i have right now...  
miss Pinky-poo_

Pinky poo,

1. AH, I'm cuddleful? Gee, thanks.

2. He was rough around the edges, but I heard that he was a loyal warrior.

3. I don't really know much about Nightcloud to hate her. Although I'm pretty sure Leafpool feels some anger towards her.

Love, Brackenfur

* * *

_Hiya Brackenwaffle!_

_1. What would you do if one of your kits went emo?  
2. Who is your favorite ShadowClan warrior, if there is one?  
3. Why is your head so big? Why is your head so big?  
4. Did Graystripe and Millie REALLY come back in a HUMMER?  
5. Have you ever thought of invading RiverClan and stealing Hawkfrost's little pink trikey? I mean, Why should HAWKFROST get a little pink trikey, and not you?_

_-Pip_

Hiya Pip!  
1. Like Jaypaw? –shiver- I have no idea. I hope that never happens though.

2. Tawnypelt is pretty nice.

3. Excuse me? My head isn't big!  
**Moosey: -cough, cough- Yes it is! –falls on the ground laughing- Great question, Pip!  
**4. I suspect so. Graystripe isn't known to lie.

5. That's a good question!! Why should Hawkfrost get a pink trikey? I might just take you up on that suggestion, Pip.

Love, Brackenfur

_

* * *

__Have you noticed that Cinderpaw is a reincarnation of Cinderpelt?_

_Aximilli2_

Aximilli2,

I just thought they both bared likeness. That is an interesting, and somewhat impossible question to answer.

Love, Brackenfur

* * *

_Dear Brackenfur,_

_1. Do you think you would kill Sorreltail if she turned evil and tried to take over the Clans(successfully)?_

_2. Did you know what a bear was before you went to Moosey's place?_

_3. Why do they never mention bears in the books?_

_4. I like cookies too. -Throws one hundred packages of Oreos at your paws, then steals half- ;)_

_5. If you could change your pelt color, what would it be?_

_6. Do you ever think that Brambleclaw is a nuisance?_

_7. What would you think if your daughter Cinderpaw fell in love with Jaypaw(THEY ARE SO CUTE TOGETHER!)?_

_8. Do you think you could ever be a kittypet?_

_9. Medicine cat?_

_10. What would happen if Sorreltail was a medicine cat? And don't say, 'oh, she would never want that kind of life'. Just answer the question, please!_

_Thanks! I might be back with more later,  
Heartsong_

Heartsong,

1.I would never kill her, because a) she would never do that, and b) The most I would do would be to try to knock some sense into her, and if that didn't work, I'd let Firestar do what he wanted to her. I trust him to pick an honorable decision.

2. I've heard of them yes.

3. I have no idea. That wouldn't be cool if bears attacked camp though.

4. Thankies!!  
5. Brown would be cool.

6. He has a bit of a big head sometimes, but I guess I trust him. He seems nice enough.

7. (WHAT DO YOU MEAN, "THEY ARE SO CUTE TOGETHER"??) That would be Cinderpaw's choice.

8. No. That is why I left Moosey's house.

9. Yuck. Herbs taste disgusting. And I need to unwind some of my energy everyday. I'd go crazy if I was cooped up in that Medicine Cat Den the rest of my life. I see the purpose of the job, however, and am glad that we have Jaypaw and Leafpool to take care of us.

10. I suppose I would still love her, but only from afar. I don't know how she would feel about me, though, if she grew up away from me.

Your welcome! I want to see answer more questions from you!  
Love, Brackenfur

* * *

_Hi Brackensugar! Did you miss me? huh? huh? I missed your answers, because i forgot my stuff and haven't come on here in forever! I am sorry! I started a new book thingie if you wanted to read that one, it is about Amberfur...i am simply stalling, while i try to think of some - aha!_

_1)did you share your cookies with your kits?  
2)Will you tell Jaypaw and Leafpool that Silverspirit says hi?  
3)What is your second favourite colour?  
4)Do you like black?  
5)silver?  
6)How about green-gray?  
7)How would you feel if I, Lexxi, Silverspirit's twoleg, were to kidnap you, instead of Moosey?  
8)If Sorreltail didn't exist, who would you mate with?  
9)do you like cherry coke zero? it is very yummy.  
10)did you notice that i am typing lots of random questions, all because i, your faithful reader, wasn't here before?  
11)do you know how to ballroom dance?  
12)do you know how to perform CPR?  
13)Does moosey know how to perform CPR?  
14)Why is your "ask brackenfur thingie" so addictive to type in?  
15)If you had to have a different name, what would it be?  
16)do you like the name Brackensugar?  
17)Can you say hi to Dustpelt for me?  
18)Can you also give Dustpelt some cookies?  
19)Can you reply to all of these soon?  
20)Are you relieved that this is my last question, for now?_

_Love,  
Silverspirit/Lexxi_

_P.S. What do you think of my new story idea? -> a rogue is turned down for help from Shadowclan when twolegs are coming to get her, so she is captured, then abused, then she escapes to Windclan, where she speaks openly against Shadowclan.  
P.S.S. enjoy the triple chewy chocolate cookies and cherry coke zeros i sent you.  
P.S.S.S. Share them!_

Dear Pal,

I would sure like to read more of your stories! It's good to hear from you again, Silverspirit!

1. I shared…once. They love it so much, now I have to keep it hidden from them!

2. Sure thing!

3. Yellow.

4. Black is cold, or at least to me it is. It symbolizes night, a time of no warmth. I suppose we need night, to balance out life, and I believe that stars are amazing, but I don't particularly enjoy the color.

5. Yes, silvers fine.

6. Bleh! That's the color of…oh, nevermind.

7. Would you feed me cookies?  
8. There is no one else but her.

9. I have only had sprite and rootbeer.

10. No, I hadn't noticed. But don't worry, I like random!!

11. No, but it sounds painful!  
12. Nope.

13. I have no idea.

**Moosey: Yes you do! One time you were choking from eating too much cookies, and I saved your life by performing CPR! You of all people should know that.**

**Brackenfur: Well, 'scuse me! I was nearly dead, do you think I would pay attention to you saving my life?**

14. I dunno. Maybe it's my oober cool personality I mentioned earlier?

15. Brackencookie.

16. Yes, that's fine.

17. I'll try too. He doesn't particularly enjoy company though.

18. FINE! GIVE HIM THE COOKIES!! LIKE _HIM_ BETTER!

**Moosey: For pete's sake! Calm down!  
Brackenfur: Who's this pete, and why should I calm down for him?  
Moosey: -head/desk- nevermind.**

**Brackenfur: I guess I got a little out of hand there, didn't I?**

**Moosey: a little out of hand? Brackenfur, you were jealous!  
Brackenfur: Jealous? Of Dustpelt? Nuh, uh. **

19. Well, it's been three days since you sent these questions in. Is that soon enough for you?  
20. No, I'll miss your lovable yet random questions.

Love, Brackenfur

P.S. Yes, yes, I love the idea. Go for it.

P.S.S. YUM!  
P.S.S.S. oh, man…**  
**


End file.
